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The Infinity Gauntlet Agency Problem

Your agency just sent another glowing report. Impressions up 47%. Click-through rates "exceeding industry standards." Rankings climbing for "dentist near me."

So why are you seeing fewer new patients than last year?

You dig deeper, ask for your Google Ads data to run your own analysis. "That's proprietary information," they say. "But trust us, everything's working great!" You remember trying to leave your last agency. The hostage negotiation began immediately: Your domain? Actually registered in their name. Your website? Built on their proprietary platform. Your Google Ads history? They own the account. Your patient reviews? Flowing through their system.

Like Thanos collecting Infinity Stones, they didn't gain this control overnight. Each stone was gathered with precision, disguised as "letting us handle everything so you can focus on dentistry."

The Six Stones of Agency Control:

Power (Your Website): "We'll build you a custom site!" But it's on their proprietary platform. Leave, and you start from scratch.
Space (Your Google Ads Account): "We'll manage everything!" Translation: They own the account, you get a dashboard. Your data stays with them forever.
Reality (Your Analytics): "Here's our reporting dashboard!" But the raw data, the real insights? That's their secret.
Mind (Your Strategy): They develop "proprietary methods" using YOUR practice as the test subject. When you leave, that knowledge walks out with them.
Time (Your Contracts): Auto-renewals, 90-day notice requirements, and setup fees that make leaving feel impossible.
Soul (Your Competitive Edge): They're running the same campaigns for five practices within 10 miles. Your "unique" strategy isn't unique at all.

Breaking Free Without Starting Over

Every agency promises to be different. But ask them these questions before you sign anything:

Will I own my website and be able to take it with me?
Can I access the actual Google Ads account, not just a dashboard?
If I leave, do I keep all my historical data and analytics?
Will you work with my existing website platform?
- How many practices do you work with within 10 miles of me?

The Real Cost of the Stones

Here's what your agency won't tell you: While they're showing you vanity metrics about impressions and clicks, the actual cost per new patient has tripled. DSOs with million-dollar budgets have driven up ad costs. Sixty percent of Google searches don't even result in clicks anymore. But you can't see this in their proprietary dashboards.

You can't compare last year's actual ROI to this year's. You can't run your own analysis. You can't even get your hands on your own data to take to another agency for a second opinion. You're flying blind while they assure you everything's "optimized."

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Real Retention Comes from Results, Not Restrictions

There's a fundamental truth about client relationships that controlling agencies don't want to admit: When you do exceptional work, clients don't want to leave. Real retention isn't about lock-in contracts or holding assets hostage. It's about consistently delivering value that makes staying an easy decision.

We give our clients complete freedom to leave at any time because it keeps us accountable. Every month, we have to earn your business again. That pressure? It drives us to stay innovative, responsive, and focused on what actually matters, your growth. When clients stay with us for years, it's not because they can't leave. It's because they've seen what happens when an agency treats their practice like it's the only one that matters. The safety of knowing you can walk away anytime paradoxically creates the trust that makes you want to stay.

"I am inevitable." - Thanos

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A Different Kind of Power

At Alien Artisan, we made a decision: Every stone stays with you. Your website, your data, your analytics, your strategy, your contracts (month-to-month, no hostages), your competitive edge. We're here to help you wield the power, not hoard it.

Because the most powerful person in any relationship should be the one paying the bills.

No infinity gauntlets. No hostage situations. Just honest marketing where you maintain control of your practice's digital future.